I’m well aware that I’m not God. However, if, by any chance, becoming God takes spending years online dating and living to share your testimony with the souls who are still in that realm, then I’m pretty close. As a seasoned veteran, I know the trials and tribulations that come with every Like, Nope, match, chat, and beyond. And although I’m well aware of the frustrations that digital dating brings, I also know the fun that’s to be had, especially if you follow these 17 Tinder commandments.
1. Thou shall not use online dating to gain Instagram followers.
3. Thou shall not use pictures with dogs who are not their own on their profile, unless explicitly detailed in their bio.
4. Thou shall keep headshots to a minimum. No shade to actors, but people want to see your truest self.
5. Thou shall not leave your bio empty.
6. Thou shall not list “School of the Hard Knocks” as your place of education (unless thou wants to sound corny).
7. Thou shall not post more than one group photo.
8. Thou shall not routinely delete and re-register on dating apps, thus confusing those who find themselves Liking or Noping you again.
9. Thou shall be patient when awaiting responses from matches. Thou shall not send passive aggressive, double messages.
10. Thou shall keep your pics (at least relatively) current.
11. Thou shall not start the conversation with “hey.”
12. Thou shall not use your bio as a place to list all of your deal breakers.
13. Thou shall be open to matching and messaging with all types of people.
14. Thou shall do your best not to ghost.
15. Thou shall not be a hypocrite who talks unkindly of using dating apps in their bio.
16. Thou shall speak to others that way you’d like to be spoken to.
17. Thou shall be thyself.