We all have things holding us back from the relationship of our dreams. Sometimes it’s circumstances beyond our control, like timing. Sometimes we may be focusing on our own dreams and visions before committing to someone else. And sometimes our emotions get in the way. Understanding the role fear plays in your relationships can help you figure out both yourself and the relationship — if any — you desire. And using your astrological sign for guidance is one way to do this.
As always, it’s important to remember that your sun sign is only part of the puzzle. Look up your birth chart, and read up on the fears associated with your sun and moon sign. You sun sign dictates your zodiac personality while your moon sign explains your deepest emotions with those closest to you and thus also provides telling insight.
Ahead, the greatest fear of each zodiac sign.
Aries: Losing Themselves
The first sign of the zodiac plays by their own rules. They blaze through life going after what they want, which is definitely not to compromise any part of their sense of self if and when they commit to another person. This fire sign fears losing themselves in caring for someone else. Sometimes accused of being selfish, Aries are very sure of their individual goals, which can make it hard for them to find space for their partners. They worry about what they will miss out on if they commit, so it’s important to reassure them that they aren’t giving up their independence.
These headstrong earth signs are unwavering in their wants, desires, and commitments. They don’t take to games lightly — in fact, they find them unnerving. They have no time for someone who acts fickle or is wishy-washy about their feelings, especially if they’ve been committed for a while. Taurus’ rule possessions and values in the zodiac, so they want to know that they are their partner’s as much as anything else that belongs to them. Give them devotion and they’ll happily be yours.
Gemini: Rejection Of Their True Selves
This flighty air sign has no problem walking away at the first sign of another’s disinterest. Their twin nature has a playful, loving side that draws people in, but make no mistake, their darkness is just as palpable. They are wary of showing their dark side for fear it will cause someone to reject them. This makes them resistant to being either tied down or vulnerable for fear that someone won’t accept their equally powerful but very different personalities. Giving them space and reassurance is the quickest way to their heart, but taking residence there requires building trust over a long period of time.
Cancer: Their Own Shortcomings
Nurturing, sweet, and completely devoted, Cancers are snuggly and loving partners. That being said, they take everything to heart. Partly because they care and partly because they are just that sensitive, their biggest fear is that anything someone doesn’t like about them will prove to be a true fault. All they want is to be good to their partners, so when someone is indifferent to the extreme measures they take to provide care, it feels like a knife to the chest. Giving in equal amounts goes a long way with them.
Leo: Not Being the Best
Leo’s need for affirmation knows no bounds. They want to know that they are the most attractive person ever, the best at sex, and the partner who mom likes best. Anything less than that will absolutely gut them. This is one sign it may be worth extending the occasional white lie to, or you risk sending them down a dark path of self-doubt. Letting them think they are the greatest wins a space in their proud but tender heart.
Analytical Virgos want the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Sometimes, they care more about another person’s open and honest nature than they do about their actions. Leaving them to wonder about anything at all can start a neurotic whirlpool of questions and back-and-forth that is best avoided. Virgos like to beat a dead horse more than any other sign, so not giving them something to worry about (if that is even possible) helps a relationship flourish.
Libra: Not Looking Good
Libras care about physical appearance unlike any other sign — they simply tend to run a little bit vain. They fear looking bad, physically or otherwise. Don’t dare embarrass them in front of friends, and pay careful attention to the effort they put into their looks. Even coordinating outfits can be a good idea. They pride themselves on their public persona and never want to worry that their partner may jeopardize that.
Scorpios get a bad reputation for how strongly they respond to any sort of betrayal. These sensitive, passionate souls feel so deeply that their jealousy is palpable, and it takes serious work to build trust with them. Once you lose a Scorpio’s trust, they disappear forever, no questions asked. Don’t think this means they don’t care — it simply means that there is no coming back from disloyalty for them.
Sagittarius: Settling Down
The third fire sign of the zodiac has a thirst for exploration that can never be quenched. Most likely to be polyamorous, they want to try dating a lot of people the same way they would try everything at a buffet. To commit, they must confront their fear of settling down. They need to make their own decision about whether someone is right for them and vice versa — any pressure will push them right out the door.
Capricorn: Being Wrong
Capricorns fear of being proven wrong makes them difficult (read: impossible) to argue with. The idea that someone could possibly say anything to delegitimize their carefully constructed argument is egregious, so it’s important to persuade them while acknowledging their points. Because Capricorns want to be seen for their mental strength, this prevents them from getting scared, not to mention angry.
Aquarius: Confronting Feelings
These airy, lovable little water bearers want to inspire magic, fun, playfulness, and exploration in others, but man-oh-man do they not want to talk about feelings. In fact, it’s often hard for them to even understand how they feel. They fear having to articulate these nebulous feelings or explain themselves to a partner, so it’s best to bring these topics up oh so gently.
Pisces are sweet, soft, compassionate creatures who crave being fully and radically seen and held by their partners. Their biggest fear is giving their all only to have it painfully unreciprocated and under-appreciated. While Pisces tend to put themselves last and not ask for what they need, they deeply desire the same emotional care and tenacity that they provide. Like Cancers, they aren’t looking to be coddled, but rather to be seen and heard for all that they are.