We’ve all questioned our true feelings for a person at one point or another. Do I love the way they fidget when they’re nervous? Or am I lusting after the fact that they flex their biceps when they’re worried? And while I’m a big believer in not overthinking everything (easier said than done, because anxiety), it’s helpful to know where you’re at in your romantic journey. And it’s actually as easy as taking a look at how your person deals with bathroom behavior — I shit you not.

Meeting The Parents

Lust: Their mom’s hot.

Love: Wow, the genes in this family will be so clutch for our kids.


Bodily Functions

Lust: This person doesn’t fart or poop.

Love: You clogged the toilet again? OK, I’ll take care of it.


Emotional Stuff

Lust: If it helps, you still look really pretty when you cry?

Love: You are an angel walking this earth, and I am here for you no matter what.


Asking About Their Day

Lust: I can’t wait to see you in that new dress you bought.

Love: I’m so excited to hear about what bridesmaids dresses your friend chose.


Going On Vacation

Lust: I get to see this person in a bathing suit for seven days.

Love: I get this person all to myself for seven days.


Social Media

Lust: Slides into your DMs.

Love: Comments on all of your photos about how perfect you are.


Sleeping Habits

Lust: Sleep? We won’t be sleeping.

Love: Ugh, the way they snore extremely loud is so cute! It’s like a baby lion.


Showing Affection

Lust: I ordered you food because I knew you were working late.

Love: I may be the world’s worst cook, but I’m going to make you a four-course meal consisting of your favorite foods.


When You’re Sick

Lust: Let me know when you’re better, and we’ll get together.

Love: I’ll be there right after work with soup and your prescription.