Jasmine Sufi is a 26-year-old slam poet from the Bay Area. At the time I am writing this, she boasts 542 Twitter followers, and she openly admits she’s never received more than 15 likes on a Tweet. That is until this weekend.
Frustrated by the ghosting epidemic, she sent what I can only call a brilliant Google survey to everyone who had ghosted her in the past six months. The Tweet in which she explained this has nearly 7,000 retweets and 41,000 likes — and counting.
“Over the last, I want to say five to six times I’ve been talking to someone, we’ve had a really good conversation, they make the first move to set up a time and place to go out, and I say, ‘yeah, sure, awesome,’” says Sufi. “Then, the day of, I hit them up and then there’s just never a response again.”
The introduction to the survey reads, “Hi! It’s me! Jaz! If I sent you this survey, it’s because you abruptly stopped responding to our conversation, you outright ghosted me, and/or we unexpectedly fell out of contact in some way. I am, of course, devastated beyond repair, as your attention was all that was sustaining me in these troubled times, but somehow I’ll soldier on. However, I’m curious, and curiosity demands data.”
When she asks the recipient to select the kind of contact they had, the options include:
- Pleasantly conversed via an online dating app and/or social media
- Traded phone numbers
- Made definitive plans to meet up
- Met in person one or more times
To explain their reasoning, recipients are asked to “please choose one or more applicable cliches.” They are:
- “It’s not you, it’s me.”
- “It’s not me, it’s you.”
- “I hope we can still be friends.”
- “Really, though, I’m a nice guy.”
- “You don’t understand! I coulda been a contender. I could’ve been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am.”
- “I would have voted for Obama a third time if I could.”
The survey’s final question, however, comes with only one possible reply. When Jaz asks, “This is weird, right,” the respondent must check ,“Yeah, obviously, but I’m a grown man and I can handle the consequences of my actions.” Slay, girl.
As for the response, it’s been expectedly mixed. “So far what I found out is that people on Twitter like it and are also very mad about it,” she says. “People said I was petty in the comments. No, petty was how one of them immediately unmatched me.” She has not heard back from the other four recipients.
“If I got that survey, I would 100-percent fill it out, because how much fun would that be?” she asks. “But it’s less of a I-would-like-to-get-a-response situation and more of a, that was kind of a bummer that happened, but I might as well laugh and get a joke out of it myself.”
We’re not just laughing. This is pure delight.