Few things induce cognitive dissonance more than our relationship with time. We’re taught from a young age that “slow and steady wins the race,” and unless you’re escaping a burning building, rushing is severely frowned upon. But, in the same chapter of “Life’s Most Confusing Lessons,” we’re told that the “early bird gets the worm.” So, you mean to tell me that that bird didn’t hit snooze at least four times, only to leap out of bed and run out of the door before all of the good worms were taken? I’m not so sure I believe that.
The concept of time is clearly a gray area, so it’s no surprise that this carries through to dating, especially when it comes to defining the relationship. It makes me think, what if we stopped allowing time to restrict us from DTR when we felt like it, even if it’s “too early” by some people’s standards? You know yourself best when making the decision to take your relationship to the next level and, therefore, probably know when it’s time to DTR, even if you haven’t been seeing each other for all that long.
Why You Should DTR Already:
- You’re both ready to commit.
- You’re not dating anyone else.
- You don’t want to date anyone else.
- You want to know where you stand before you spend more time with them.
- You’ve already been calling them your boyfriend/girlfriend/partner behind their back.
- You don’t like the idea of them dating someone else.
- You already feel comfortable doing natural-yet-gross human things around them (you know what they are).
- You’ve planned a date more than a month in advance.
- It’s more than just sex.
- It just feels right.
Why You Shouldn’t DTR Yet:
- You think it’ll cure your loneliness.
- You want to sleep with them.
- You feel pressured to do so.
- You’re tired of third-wheeling.
- You think being in a relationship will make them open up to you more.
- One (or both) of you is newly single, so why not?
- You’re still seeing other people.
- You’re tired of dating.
- You think it’ll make you happier.
- You’re ignoring your gut.