When it comes to pleasing anyone other than the person I’m dating, I will not hesitate to take a blade and some body wash and get to work. But the person I’m seeing in an at least semi-romantic way? Forget about it.
We, as women, have been conditioned to believe it is embarrassing to have a hairy, well, anything, and I’m a firm believer that being au naturel (or not) is a matter of personal preference. But I’ve accepted that I subscribe to the “norms” of being shaven. It’s not that I’m ashamed of my body hair, but I feel bad subjecting random people, none of who signed up to stare at or stroke my stubble, to a furry leg or whatever else. Whereas with an S.O., my mentality is very if you can’t take me at my 5 o’clock shadow, you don’t deserve me at my smooth. They did sign up for this, and they would look like a total monster if they ended it over body fur. But these good people? They should hardly have to deal with the stresses of my tresses.
There is nothing worse than getting a pedicure and realizing you didn’t shave your legs. I cringe at the thought of a nail technician gently massaging lotion into my skin, only to be met with scratchy stray hairs. I smile sheepishly, thinking that she shouldn’t have to endure rug burn post-pedicure. And while you’re not supposed to shave right before a pedi because it increases your risk of infection, I vow never to go to the nail salon with a layer of leg wool.
It may sound weird since a waxer’s job is to remove hair, but I’m not talking about what’s in my bikini area. If you’ve ever gotten a wax, you know how cold those rooms are. And how your leg hair stands especially high, like little daggers. And how how you must move your legs in uncompromising positions as to get all the angles. And that at some points, the waxer may graze your leg. Remember: They didn’t expect to deal with all that.
Shaving isn’t for everyone. Body hair is a choice. Yet even though I’m a lazy POS, I still feel better, lighter even, when I shave. There is nothing as satisfying as getting into your bed at night after fully shaving from head to toe. Also, like yes, when my armpit hair grows long enough for it to be soft, it is nice to touch but then I can’t resist the stroke, and I realize I’m sitting on the subway with my hand under my shirt caressing my pit. Not my best look.
Ok, everyone relax. I’m referring to the annual beach vacation I take with my mom, stepdad, and sister, or the handful of times I go home during the summer mostly to use their pool. (Never mind that it’s a two-hour trip.) My family neither cares nor would they probably pay attention to my hairiness, but the thought of the possibility of them noticing makes every hair on my body stand up. I’d rather swim and tan without subjecting my family to any (more) awkward moments.
This is really shorts weather-specific, and honestly, maybe it’s all in my head. Anyway, I have blonde leg hair and when it’s long and strong and the summer light hits it just so, it glistens and reflects, shining like the top of the Chrysler Building. It’s very distracting (to me). Again, this could be in my head, but I’d rather be safe than sorry when it comes to my leg mane causing a car accident.