Guess what? Dating is awkward. Guess what else? Virtual dating is even more awkward. But 1. you knew that, 2. we should all still be doing it, and 3. it would be even more awkward to message someone for weeks without seeing their face, then end up in a stalemate over who is going to ask who to FaceTime. But virtual dating is what we have right now, and it’s worth trying for a lot of very-good-and-not-made-up-in-my-brain reasons.
1. Your thumbs will atrophy soon if they don’t get a texting break.
2. If it gets, like, super awkward, you can hang up and pretend there was a bad connection.
3. Who wants to wait who knows how long to see the person they’re into?
4. You get to go on a date in your sweatpants.
5. You get to go on a date without leaving your couch.
6. You don’t have to share any of the food you ordered.
7. You don’t have to forgo the burrata for a vegetable to “balance out the meal” or whatever.
8. If you feel like cutting the date short, you can say you’re getting another call that you have to answer.
9. It’d be nice to see a face besides your Aunt Judy’s over FaceTime.
10. It’s trendy.
11. It’s the closest you can get to being on an in-person date.
12. You get to eliminate the awkward end-of-date who-pays debacle.
13. You automatically eliminate the awkward “are we gonna kiss? We’re going to kiss. Do I even want to kiss them?”
14. You get to have your roommate vet your date from off-screen. They won’t know a thing.
15. You can have your roommate cause a ruckus if you want to get the eff off this date.
17. You don’t have to wait for a waiter to bring you water when your mouth gets dry.
18. You don’t have to wait in line for the bar bathroom and freak out that your date assumes you’re pooping.
19. You can sit in positions you wouldn’t sit in at a restaurant. Cross-legged or on top of your feet — the
world apartment is your oyster.
20. If they say something you don’t know how to react to, you can drop your phone (you’re so clumsy!) and figure out what to say while picking it up.
21. You can bring your pet to the date, which obviously is the dream.